I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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