Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
