FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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