The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
