i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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