well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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