you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
