You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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