i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
