Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
