brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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