I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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