And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
