Swine flu. Run for my life!
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I need moral support for this bender
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Randomize
