Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
