Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
