Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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