Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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