watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize