Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
foreskin is a definite game changer
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
