Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
