If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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