If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
