last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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