And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
