I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
