i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
