Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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