Having a random hookup so left but love u
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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