they need to just BURY HIM!
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Randomize
