just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
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