fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
im having a threesome with these popsicles
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
