Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
