Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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