marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
