Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
