Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
