Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
how drunk are you?
Several
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
