my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
