Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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