Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
