She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
