they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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