Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
