I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
