pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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