i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
