Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
