You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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