Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
